Domestic violence is not your fault
Many victims find themselves thinking they contributed to their abuse. This is never the case.
The perpetrator
People who abuse others have an unhealthy view of reality. They may have a life that did not turn out the way they wanted. They may not be earning the income they wish, they may not look the way they hope, they may not have the relationships they dreamt of. These are a few examples. This lack led to comparison. This type of evaluation if not addressed, leads to envy. Envy unchecked leads to jealousy.
Jealousy leads to violence. In body language first. The person starts to look at you in a certain way. You feel the eerie stare but you ignore it. Perhaps because the person is close to you. They are that close that you do not suspect they may have the early stages of resentment towards you. Then the emotion evolves into speech. This comes in a form of criticism. When you question it, they play it off. This can continue for years without it turning violent.
The victim in domestic violence
This person is usually naive. They may not have ill intentions towards the perpetrator. They hope for and expect the same from the to be, abuser. This is as I mentioned, due to often a close relationship with the perpetrator. They share their life stories with this person. The perpetrator usually offers a hearing ear and many times a shoulder to cry on. When the victim is criticized by them, the victim looks within the criticism to find what is constructive.
Looking to the Word
Now I urge you, brethren, note those who cause divisions and offenses, contrary to the doctrine which you learned, and avoid them. For those who are such do not serve our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly, and by smooth words and flattering speech deceive the hearts of the simple.- Romans 16:17-18. These are the doings of those who do not walk by the love of Christ. No matter what they may say or the authority they hold in your life. Deception is how many find themselves in domestic violence.
Leave a comment. Have you ever been abused?
Comments